I love technology. I love the revolution IT gives to anything and everything. Everything is easy with technology.
I can bank and withdraw while seated, I can do my presentations at work while seated, I can sort out client issues while seated, my reports are online, hire online, while others get husbands and wives online. hahahaa!
Technology is just perfect. Couple that with a fast high end gadget, having 3G/4G speed. Online presence has never been made sweeter.
No wonder the net is highly addictive and calls for personal discipline.
Now, let’s talk about the modern day women: I call her the 3G/4G woman.
4G technology is fast and so is a 3G/4G woman. She is too fast in making decisions prior to marriage.
To her, everything has to be instant. She cannot take time to pray and seek direction, take time in seeking advice from the other successful married couples. She is just fast.
She is highly responsive. She does not take time to study this man before any concrete commitment.
No wonder sex is now more casual than my casual wear.
One night stands are considered okay and are no longer whispered along the dark corners of the office corridors. It’s celebrated, it’s cheered.
It’s always part and parcel of a conversation. If we weren’t in the dispensation of grace, I bet we would be covered in lots of sulfur and brimstones from heaven.
She is available, wherever-whenever. Provided there is the line of site, she is there.
Courtship is cheapened and she believes the lie from the devil that sleeping with a guy would makes him love her.
Oh! That’s lots of pure crappy lies. Yes! Let me not even start on that topic.
She is draining. Similar to the way the two networks drain the battery out, they drain the man’s pocket(s), drains the man’s ego, his masculinity and are always demanding and nagging and manipulative.
Remember what the Bible says: Proverbs 31 – a virtuous woman enriches a man, and she does him good?
That she considers a field and buys it, and with her hands SHE WORKS? A 3G/4G woman is totally the opposite.
She is manipulative. Manipulation can’t wait to get. Love can’t wait to give. She cannot love.
The bible tells us to flee from sin, and for the men, the Bible tells them to flee strange women.
You are not to give her attention nor your youthfulness. The Lord knew how addictive that life is, and it’s the only road to destruction and sorrow.
In some interior places, getting a 3G/4G network is mission impossible. 3G/4G woman cannot contain a life that seems low. She cannot love sacrificially.
They are always have a plan B in case the route she has taken doesn’t work. Of course life has it’s dynamics, for better yes! For worse…..
The older generation of women placed high value on their marriages and family. Nothing could come in between them and their commitment to make their marriages last.
They went way beyond what is considered the norm. They sacrificed their every bit for their families. They were not career women as we are, nor did they drive cars as we do.
They woke up at dawn to prepare for their husbands meals before walking for miles to fetch some firewood and water.
They did not wear stilettos, they had cracked heels, “miatukas” in my mother tongue. The salon was foreign to them.
They plaited “matuta”, kept an afro, or hot combed their hair. Their hands were not smooth. They didn’t know what a pedicure or manicure is.
They did not know what Elizabeth Arden, Beyonce Heat, Givenchy and all those designer sprays are.
They smelt smoke throughout. Without all those niceties, they still made their marriages work. She respected her husband, desired him and loved him beyond everything.
Her family was her kingdom. She was pious industrious and espoused to good values.
Fast forward to this generation of women, 3G/4G women.
Marriage is for show off or for the money. It’s never for companionship, it’s for “who has the largest, original ring in the office”.
It’s never for love, it’s for the high end life you will be living. It’s never for better or for worse, it’s conditional – for better yes, for worse no. It’s either this or not.
Am a woman yes, not subservient, but truthfully speaking, women have become manipulative, materialistic, and ungodly and have certainly left a lot to be desired.
Proverbs 31:10-31 King James Version (KJV) says this, “Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” The bible also says that whoever has found a wife, has found favor in the Lord’s eyes.
Anyone can get married. Anyone can pull a wedding, but it takes God to find a wife. It takes God to find a husband.
Funny enough the principles of marriage don’t change. Whether you are a Christian, Muslim, Hindu, or a Buddhist.
The principles of marriage are constant. Of course knowing Christ makes it all easy to handle.
His divine presence and intervention is what keeps the gravity and prevents you from being sucked in into void of disagreements and the storms of life.
Who can find a wife? That means, if you find her, treat her right. She is one rare being.
The 3G/4G women want everything, pap! In an instant! They met a man today, assess his pockets and pap, they want to settle.
They don’t take time to know the men they want to marry, they just want to be heard they are Mrs. so and so. For some it actually works, but mostly, it doesn’t.
They do not appreciate the process of growth and want already what has been worked on. These are the women who break many marriages.
- You don’t get married because you are “late” and all your friends are married. Marriage doesn’t know what age you are. You can be 40 years but unable to cope.
- You don’t get married for the money. What If it all goes away? Riches have wings (Proverbs 23:5).What if your husband is fired? Or your assets are frozen?
- You don’t get married because he, your family or friends are putting pressure on you to settle.
- You don’t get married to be free from your parents. Trust me, you will need them after your honeymoon! Almost daily!
- You don’t get married because she is beautiful with a smashing figure and he is too handsome. Of course physical attraction should be there, otherwise sexual fulfillment will be a daily struggle. If you base your reasons for marriage on their physique, my friend you are on the road to disappointment. What if she gets out of shape after the baby comes? What if she gets stretch marks everywhere below her waist? What if her boobs sag after breastfeeding your children? What if he is suddenly crippled and he cannot stand tall besides you? Will you quit because ohhh! She has changed? Or he has changed?
- You don’t get married to have sex! It’s just part of the marriage package. Yes, men are testosterone walking beings, but you won’t eat sex afterwards. Plus he has other primary needs.
- You don’t get married because you are lonely. You got to figure yourself out before walking down that aisle.
- You don’t get married to be happy. Marriage makes you happy yes, but what if from day 1 your expectations are not met? Will you still be happy or you quit? When you seek the joy of the Lord, it becomes your strength in difficult situations. You will remain happy. The joy of the Lord is what gives you the strength to push on when it’s stormy.
- You don’t get married to prove that you are grown up. Marriage takes maturity to sustain and show off is not part of it.
- You certainly don’t settle because you are pregnant. What if the father is not ready to take responsibility? Will you force him to? Some own up and they start a family, but if he is not a responsible man? Lady, be wise.
- You don’t get married because you want a baby, what if they don’t come. Babies are gifts from above. A gift can be given or not, but that doesn’t mean you quit your marriage because you can’t conceive. People have waited for babies and trust me, it takes God to make that baby and carry it to full term. It is not just sex, and it’s not instant. It takes GOD!
- You marry because you love this lady/man to death. That you are ready to sacrifice anything and everything to see them happy.
- You marry because you have a desire to share a life with him/her. From your aspirations to your dreams, the ups and downs, the good times the bad times, the serious times, the goofy ones, every little bit of it.
- You marry to have a lifetime companion. Someone you can confide in, someone who won’t judge you. Someone who knows your weaknesses but is still there to support you through.
- You marry because you have realistic expectations of each other and you need not pretend towards the other person. That he/she knows how you react towards situations, what you love, what you don’t love and you both understand that you are human. You will err but will be willing to work things through.
- You marry to be connected to that person you love and to grow with this person in every sphere of life.
- You marry because they are willing to fully support you, unconditionally, through it all, to love them ad infinitum.
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Part 2…coming soon.