Our 1st Corinthians series continues and today, we talk about something that was once a big burden to me. Why lie.
Getting pissed off was as easy as taking a cup of tea. The problem was not really getting angry, the problem was how easy it was to spin me off and hold that offense for a really long time.
Sometimes i look at myself in the mirror and think, wooow “Lord you have really worked on me!”
When God says Love is not easily angered, it simply means that. It is not easily angered.
It means that at times, you have to hold your tongue and let your anger subside, before talking out.
It means that it’s easy for you to let go, and let the water pass under the bridge.
It means that you choose to pray for your heart first before attempting to correct another person.
Trust me, if you end up getting angry at everything your wife or husband does, you will be depressed!
The little quirks that were once endearing become quickly agitating.
Marriage requires you to keep silent quick enough when angered, that your tongue will hold, and not act like a sword.
It requires you to let go of the offenses quicker, and forgive in the quickest way possible without reminding each other of one’s failures.
We all get married with sacks of expectations that we are sure or almost sure that our spouses will fulfill.
Then it so happens that a realization dawns on you that you didn’t marry such a ‘saint’ after all.
He or she fails short terribly.
Love that is patient “puts up with a lot” and Love that is not easily angered, really takes a lot NOT to be angered. I.e. it is not easily provoked.
I remember when I got married, of course, I was ready, but I was not ready to be disappointed!
I was so sure my hubby won’t fail me and I won’t fail him either. I had my “A” game on!
As we got to live together, I realized we had differences, and those little differences are the ones that constantly irritated us.
I love planned goals, he is the spontaneous one of both of us.
I don’t clear the table on time, and he rises up to clear it as soon as he’s had his last bite.
He is more meticulous than I am when it comes to hanging clothes in the wardrobe.
I remember hanging his shirts the way I knew, and the meticulous he was shocked because according to him, I was wrong in hanging his shirts the way I did.
Hubby knows that shirts have categories!
Can you imagine categorizing shirts!
Stripped, checked, whites, creams, jean T-shirts! and they had to be hang that way!
Imagine my shock and disappointment. I had to redo all that work again! I was so pissed and he got pissed because I was pissed! How lame could we get?
Right now we can afford to laugh about it because we learnt that love is patient, and it is not easily provoked.
But back then, how was that any laughable?
Days have passed and we have grown in our marriage. I learnt to execute my husband’s request(s) without feeling like he is punishing me. He too has learnt to be patient with me.
I had to strive to be better than what I thought I was.
Love that is not easily angered helps us to be contained.
We do not rise to the bait and let anger overcome our emotions.
We do not fly off and make conclusions for each other.
We are slow to judge and not hasty to make conclusions.
As you seek to understand each other, pray that the Lord will keep your emotions grounded, that you won’t talk without thinking.
Just keep quiet first if aggrieved, wait for the emotions to sink in before talking.
It is wise woman of God, not to be haste in speech.
Do not break your marriage because of a loose tongue.
That you have a perfect lipstick, you said the perfect vows, but your lips have the imperfect talk.
For my brothers, let not you anger provoke you to hurt the woman you married with your sharp tongue.
Do not disparage her ideas. Do not provoke her into anger just because you are the “head of the house.”
Remember that leadership equates to servant-hood.
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.