In Singleness & Relationships

WHAT DO YOU DO IN SINGLENESS? – PART 14

If you have been following, we have done a 14-part series of what you should do while single and waiting on the Lord.

I would like to thank God for all who reached out to me to do this series and my prayer is that, you have been blessed and built.

As we wrap up this series, let me summarize the key points.

  • Being single is a gift. You aren’t a second class citizen and you shouldn’t feel pressured to settle. Enjoy it!
  • Singleness has its own convenience, so take that time to build yourself and stock up some vital skills that will be prudent in marriage.
  • Be whole, don’t wait for someone fill up your void.
    You cannot afford to go into marriage expecting the other person to be your source of happiness.
    It’s an expectation that will flop tremendously.
  • Singleness is a daily struggle with sexual passions and loneliness, but you can overcome. What do you do? Know your limits, decide to wait, flee sexual immorality, be accountable to someone of the same sex, or a couple, and feed on God’s word and prayer.
    [ Psalms 119:9 “How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word.”]
  • Singleness is just for a season. Enjoy it. Be a victor in your singleness, not a victim or wallowing in a pity party.

So what do you do in singleness?

  • Love the Lord with all you have. Not part, but all.
  • Love yourself! Hug yourself, treat yourself!
    Be whole before you commit to someone for the rest of your life. Esteem yourself.
  • Broaden your interests beyond your norm. Interests makes you interesting.
    You cannot let boredom kick in your life.
  • Avoid manipulative and disingenuous people. They will make you stagnant and doubt your ability to deliver.
    Keep your company limited to people who propel you.
    They need not all be confidants, but choose your friends wisely.
  • Live within your means. No one wants to marry a liability. Practice financial management when single.
  • Set a guard on your heart. Do not let in every one in your bedroom chamber.
    Keep your dreams to yourself until they materialize.
  • Respect marriages. You want God to honor you, keep off people’s husbands and wives. Stop sending them private DMs’ What do you gain by following them up? Wait on the Lord for yours.

Last but not the least.

  1. BUILD YOUR KNOWLEDGE BASE ON MARRIAGE.

It’s funny how well we prepare for an interview, yet do not take time to prepare for marriage.
We get into marriage handicapped.

Build your knowledge base on marriage.

Interact with them who have been there and are walking the journey with soberness.
Talk to them, surround yourself with them [of course keep your boundaries], but see how they live their life.

Knowledge is power!

The Bible clearly says that Gods people perish because of lack of knowledge.

Now my Christian brothers. Let’s talk.
A man lives with his wife, according to KNOWLEDGE! I didn’t say that, God did.

So you got to study your future wife, see what makes her tick. Don’t be a foolish Christian man. She is a woman before anything else. So treat her right.

How do you get knowledge?
By interacting with people who have walked the journey and conquered, by listening to their frailties, failures and their lessons.
By reading, by listening.

Get knowledge. Do not be embarrassed to ask questions.
A wise person asks questions.
Show me anyone great who did not question something.
So ask and ask.

  1. PRACTICE SELFLESSNESS.

It’s not too early to begin practicing selflessness.
Invest in other people not just yourself, especially people who are not fortunate enough.
Be philanthropic.

Visit the sick, the orphans, the widows, the widowers and the elderly.
Give your time too. Learn to give.

Marriage, in all honesty, is about giving, it’s never been about taking. If you aren’t prepared to give, just take your time until you are ready.

Let me tell you something about marriage.

I hear lots of talk.

Especially among ladies, talking about how they cannot sacrifice their carrier for their marriage, the reality is, in marriage – you will sacrifice, and sacrifice isn’t always sweet, but the rewards cannot be equated to what you sow.

You will hold your Masters off for a while, you will sacrifice traveling for your marriage, you will sacrifice.

I do not mean that your husband won’t sacrifice either, I am just informing you on the truth.

Know that marriage will require you to sacrifice and a huge amount of selflessness.

Not that you will never follow up on your dreams, but occasionally, they will be deferred for a greater reward. If you cannot defer anything for the sake of your marriage, spouse or children, then hold off on marriage till you are ready.

10.CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE.

Attitude is everything.

Think of yourself as small, and you will be small. Term marriage as a hustle, it will be a hustle. View marriage as a prison, it will be one.

Take this time to change your perception and perspective towards marriage and singleness.
Enjoy your singleness, but look forward to marriage with a positive attitude [if you are planning to settle i.e. ]

It is hard-work, but has insurmountable rewards.
Change your attitude and you will change everything.

God bless you as you walk the journey of singleness to marriage.
Keep the faith!

 

 

#singleseries
#marriageworks
#Godspeed

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Mary Munene

Totally sold out to Christ. Wife to my amazing John. Blessed to be a mother of a beautiful daughter. The Lord perfecting us in our daily walk! I love marriage in Christ! It's so divine!

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