It’s a measure or condition that keeps someone or something under control.
Unemotional, dispassionate, or moderate behaviour; self-control.
Sometimes, most of the time, I find myself exercising restraint in my marriage and the truth is, it’s not easy.
It’s a deliberate act, not one that flows freely. Of course the more you exercise it, the more you learn to master your emotions but as I said, it’s by deliberation.
Restraint in marriage is in several forms.
For instance, your hubby pisses you off and you choose not to talk then because you are emotionally wounded.
Talking might just deepen the chasm that’s already there.
He brings up an idea, which you clearly know won’t work, but you choose to be supportive and not discourage him in whichever way.
You cook a meal that’s down right a “machanganyiko maalum” ,but he chooses to eat it and commend you for the good work in the kitchen.
He comes home late and didn’t alert you about his whereabouts, you instead choose to welcome him warmly, serve him, then bring up your grievances later, when he’s full, joyful, and super-re-energized for the night.
You are so bored, tired and sleepy but you choose to listen to him anyway – even chewing a ballpoint pen to keep awake!
Restraint is the word.
That you don’t need to say, what’s on your mind then, because there’s a bigger picture, and it’s peace.
It doesn’t mean that you can’t say it, but wisdom dictates of you chose when and how to say it.
That you will weigh your words, sieve them and refine them so that when said, they will not wound but embrace and cause healing.
Restraint is the wisdom now for all and sundry.
It’s alright to celebrate, but how do you do it?
Are you taunting others? Are you abusive? Are you puffery? Are you jeering others?
It’s alright to feel low, but in that low moment, are you sucked up in that vortex that you become irrational?
Are your emotions causing you to be unreasonable that others cannot embrace you? Are your emotions causing you to be prejudicial?
Restraint should be exercised now.
For restraint exercised yields self-control,and self-control yields patience.
For without self-control one will be filled with impulsive convulsions.
What’s is self control? It’s a fruit of the Holy Spirit.
It’s not about God making us live an austere kind of life, never enjoying what needs to be enjoyed.
A tree can yield a fruit or not. It depends on how well it’s continually being taken care of.
This is analogy is parallel fruits of the Holy Spirit. You can bear them or not, and the word of the Lord clearly says that you shall know them by their FRUITS!
Be fruitful in this election season.
Do not look back and regret on some of the things you said to others.
Do not ruin your testimony just because of your sycophancy.
Exercise restraint, yield self-control and in turn, yield patience.
Remember this :
“A man without self-control is like a city
broken into and left without.”
“A fool vents all of his
anger, but a wise man brings himself
” Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath [passion, rage, bad temper] and resentment [anger, animosity] and quarreling [brawling, clamor, contention] and slander [evil-speaking, abusive or blasphemous language] be banished from you, with all malice [spite, ill will, or baseness of any kind].
And become useful and helpful and kind to one another, tender-hearted [compassionate, understanding, loving-hearted], forgiving one another [readily and freely], as God in Christ forgave you.