Yesterday we got into a very healthy discussion with my husband about mutual submission.
Let me share some insights we found from the word.
The Bible says in Ephesians 5:21 that married couples ought to submit to one another. To quote the word correctly, the Bible says, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I have got so many ladies text me asking, why is it only me? Why the women? Why can’t the men submit too? Why should I follow what he says and he seem to disregard me or my input?
To begin with, let me emphasize on this, the Bible does not insist on the women alone. God isn’t biased in any way. As a matter of fact, He is so wise, that He regards our own imagination or thoughts as foolishness.
You see, when the Bible admonishes and commands us to submit, God knew that this was not such a natural occurrence to us. Our natural inclination is to be “one” with someone, to love, to cling, to hold, to help, that’s what come naturally to us.
For the men, their natural insist is to reason with logic and accord respect to whoever desires, and that is why God, in His infinite wisdom, commanded the man to leave and cleave to his wife, and to love her.
God told us to do what does not happen to us naturally, couple that with the fact that our sinful nature draws each and every one without blushing to ourselves.
We naturally and instinctively look out for our own welfare before the other person.
Therefore, God does not just ask us to submit but our husbands too are to submit. The point to reference is this, it’s out of reverence for Christ! It’s not out of being forced to do it, but it’s out of the fear of the Lord.
The fear of the Lord gives you the true North. He give you wisdom on how to handle your matters at home and in your marriage.
In submitting out of reverence for Christ, makes your will dispensable and you do what would please the Lord – you do the will of the Lord.
What would please the Lord? LOVING YOUR WIFE AND SUBMITTING TO YOUR HUSBAND HENCE MUTUAL SUBMISSION!
Christ should be our focal point. When you feel like not doing it, you do it out for the reverence for Christ.
So does this mean that he is not the head?
He is certainly the head, and his way of submitting to you is not your way of submitting to him.
A man submits to his wife through serving her. By giving himself to her. By nourishing her. The authority to submit, is the authority to serve.
His submission is of servitude.
How do I know this?
Christ expressly tells the man, to love his wife, as Christ loved the church that He gave Himself up for her.
That is how Christ submitted himself to the Church and did what the will of the father was, not matter how costly it was.
If Christ didn’t do it, then we could be in eternal doom.
No woman can be pig-headed (unless one that truly doesn’t value you) if loved.
Mrs. Your husband’s expression of submission cannot be the same as you since the way God created is different and what gives us immense joy is also different.
You have been called to support you husband, being prayerful, employing a lot of wisdom to carefully help your husband make the right decisions for your family.
If both parties understand how perfectly God made them to benefit from each other, then the husbands’ wont demand respect and the wives wont demand to be loved.
We would give to our spouses what they need.
Husbands, serve your wives. Nourish them, listen to them, take the initiative in your marriage and in the household matters, and cherish them. Praise them and fill her innermost being with love.
Wives, serve your husbands. Respect them, admire them, support them and stir them to be great men who will make great impact in the society.
Another area of mutually submitting to each other is agreeing to learn from each other. Do not be so hard headed that you cannot learn from your spouse. If you cannot cook miss, then agree to be shown how to, probably your husband can sponsor you to a catering class.
If you cannot fix somethings in the house, agree to learn.
Mutual submission involves having a plan to mature. Are you both where you were when you go married?
Headship and submission are both points of sacrifice in marriage that we would not have otherwise done naturally. Marriage is a place of giving, not taking.
We both have our own place in marriage, each is unique, each is beautiful.
Mutual submission mirrors what our relationship should be with Christ as church and His only bride.
Die to yourselves that your marriages will live.
Mr. be strong, loving and gentle and Mrs. be wise, discreet and submissive.