In Marriage Matters

30 days of gratitude: Day 7- Respect him

Do you know that outtalking each other doesn’t equate to changing each other’s minds or hearts? Keeping quiet either doesn’t equate to punishing each other. All end up in one thing, a disconnected heart.

This is what we all need to know, and repeatedly sink that in us until it becomes part of our character.

We are gifted. I know that. We feel the things unseen. We have a strong sense of intuition. We “feel” that a project might fail way before it begins. We “feel” that a friend might not be such an asset to our husbands.

Our intuition is a big plus in our marriages. God made us so. It’s part of our femininity.
Though, as perceptive or discerning as it is,therein lies the danger of being too pushy and overbearing.

I have made that mistake in my marriage. There was a time I strongly felt that a venturing into a certain project wasn’t such a profitable idea. My intuition was skewed towards the probability of it’s failure. As good as percipient as i was, as genuine as the feeling was, as convicting as it was, I didn’t articulate it to Johnny with grace and wisdom.

I thought shouting down, watering down his ideas will make him see my point. Well, it costed us our peace and happiness– and definitely, huge loss.
Then the Lord taught me again.

Demonstrating respect to him, is as simple as articulating your counter opinion with grace, encouraging his endeavours, however “opposed” you feel towards them, as you pray for God’s revelation on the might be the “blind spots.”

Was it easy for me? No, It was hard..

Relegating control over to God in regards to husband’s ideas, was hard. However hard it was, it was perfect.

God’s ways aren’t necessarily easy or rutted. His way(s) might be hard, but it’s perfect. I have never looked back.However, disappointed you might feel on the numerous losses both of you might have encountered, the only remedy is relegating control over to God, and curing your “how to.”

Most husbands do listen to wives who know “how to” address any issue with grace. It makes them feel respected. His deepest longing is to feel respected by the woman he has chosen to stand by, for the rest of his life.

Does he want to get a new TV set and you would rather save? Find “how to” talk to him – be gracious. Shouting that idea down, however dumb it might be to you, might just spin him over to the extreme just to prove a point.

Does he want to buy an IPhone X while you have an old phone that needs “jumpstarting” and restarting often? Find your “how to”.

Abigail was still able to handle her husband Nabal in his folly. By so doing, she averted the calamity that was to befall on her and her household from the sword of David. God also vindicated for her by smiting Nabal down.

We have been graced with so much charm! Our femininity should transform whatever comes close to us. So how about serenading him, intoxicating him with your love until he surrenders!Find your “how to”

D.I.Y: Demonstrate your respect to him by following his lead – especially in those things that you two have not agreed on. Tell him that you have a different opinion on it, but you trust his judgement and you know that the Lord will guide him.
Go point: Be calm and excited on his endeavours, follow through with what he asks you to do.
VERSE OF THE DAY: Ephesians 5:33, However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.


Lord Jesus,You have asked us to ask for wisdom in dealing with the issues of life.
You have asked us to ask for wisdom when we lack it.
Here I am asking for grace and wisdom to respect my husband. It’s not easy following through some things he asks – and more so when I have a different approach of things.

Teach me to respect his opinions and even go a step further of having the grace to support him as I lean on you on his behalf.
Help me not to be push over but demonstrate respect through following his lead.

Teach me ways of articulating my counter opinion or my different perceptions with grace and submissiveness. Help to relay them without being demanding or arrogant.In Jesus name I pray.


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Mary Munene

Totally sold out to Christ. Wife to my amazing John. Blessed to be a mother of a beautiful daughter and a handsome son. The Lord perfecting us in our daily walk! I love marriage in Christ! It's so divine!

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