The S word never goes down well with most women. The word am referring to here is SUBMISSION. The issue is not that the submission is wrong, the issue is that it’s been corrupted by the enemy to subvert God’s beauty in a marriage union.

But, however twisted or turned it is, we, as women who are after the heart of Christ, have to follow our husbands lead. There’s a beauty that comes from a heart fully surrendered to God when it comes to our homes.

To be submissive is a command from the Lord but it’s purely our prerogative to follow.  It’s a choice, to follow, or not. I am yet to come across a marriage running on the fuel of aggression and combativeness from a wife.

There are all sorts of people and groups out there that come to fight for women’s rights and their place in the society. I hail them for that. However we should be very wary of what we take heed to as wives.

A type of feminism that leaves God out, that tries to sabotage God’s alignment and order in a home, should be shunned.

God, being the creator of first man’s breathe, has the truest depth of our femininity. He has the original blueprint.

A submissive woman, is one who knows that her place is of equal responsibility to her husband and does not need to fight him to prove that point.

It’s a woman who embraces her shade of bloom without fighting nor trading in her principles for temporal seasons.

Feminism, as the Bible puts it, is not about aggression or “win-at-all-cost” approach. The Bible embraces feminism as submission, with a quiet and calm spirit, knowing too well that your Lord sits down as the anchor audience to your marriage.

He, your husband, has the responsibility of leadership, you nurture your home and none can function without the other.

Fellow wife, when you fight him, trying every bit to be heard through nagging, getting wrong advice from women who are led by circumstances and feelings and have no idea of what building, more so in marriage entails, then you are setting up for an imminent failure.

I understand that sometimes, we find ourselves at crossroads. I clearly understand. Hard seasons rock and the temptation to sideline our husbands hardens our hearts, making us susceptible to ursup them.

I understand.

But submission doesn’t mean that you should nag or manipulate him to your bidding.

It doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t suggest any other idea to your husband.
It doesn’t silence you in your marriage, not make you a doormat.

The bible says that she “speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue” (Proverbs 31:26).

See, she speaks, a wise woman speaks, but with wisdom and faithful instruction in her mouth.

That is where the rubber meets the road ladies. Wisdom will dictate to you that you should follow his lead (as long as it’s not sinning), but suggest other great ways to make HIS IDEA better – with wisdom.
Ask me, I have been there. Trying so hard to assert my independent mindset on my husband. It did more harm than good. We were spiralling down to fast, I could hardly breathe.

There are myriad of examples in our day to day lives that I have followed my husband’s lead, and Christ has changed his mind before we even began, without me being so “strong and assertive.”

Our beauty is in submission. Follow his lead!       

Submitting your husband, is simply trusting the lead Director who is Christ. You choose to let go of the control card, and yield it to Christ.

We will follow our husbands lead… but who said it’s easy? Who says it’s easy to submit? Yet Christ gave us an assignment that He knows too well that it doesn’t come easy.

Submission is not tested when everything is fine and he’s all so dolled up, loving and “baebaeing” you all the way.

Submission is NOT natural. We have to ask the Lord to teach our hearts, above all, be willing to do. Submission is tested when you are in between your husband’s decision and your self will.

Will you trust God enough to religate your spot for your husband?

What about a man who doesn’t listen at all, easily provoked and aloof? Well, fellow wife, God is really interested in getting that man in line. He can, He is God, but He is also interested in getting your heart to the right place, through the right way.

We fail when we quit doing our part, simply because our husbands are not. Or, we lay in wait, hoping that he will suddenly spring into action.

My advice, do not honk at a packed car, nor let your obedience to Christ be pegged on your husband’s change. The Bible says that such husbands are won over not by talk, but by action. 1st Peter 3.
Our actions preach so much more than our outbursts, speeches, lectures, or silent treatment would.

You do your part. God is still the Lord of hard seasons and a marriage covenant is an area often plagued by such.

However, when hard seasons come, will you quit on your obedience to Christ, or will you yield to the pressure of “I?”

Your faithfulness to Christ should never be dependent on your husband’s faithfulness towards you. It doesn’t work that way.

His faithfulness to you is a fruit of the Holy Spirit’s work in you.

Today, choose to follow your husband’s lead. If it’s too hard, ask for grace to go through the season.

Remember that he will be won over by your actions, 1st Peter 3:5.

Follow his lead, its the hallmark of beauty in any woman.         

VERSE OF THE DAY: Colossians 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

D.I.Y: Do an act of service that demonstrates your servitude attitude to him. A service to show that you will follow his lead. This act should be one that costs you! Remember it’s an ACT OF SERVICE..NOT A GIFT!

Say, “Hunnie, remember that project you wanted to do? I think it’s a great idea. I support you fully. What did you have in mind?”

Open the door for dialogue and healthy conversation…

If you still feel uneasy, take it to Christ in prayer…you might be so sucked in your ways, yet your husband is the one who truly is in the Lord’s will.

Go point: Be full of gratitude.


Lord Jesus

I thank you for giving me the blessing of a marriage. Lord you have commanded me to follow my husband’s lead, but Lord, it’s so hard.

I really want my way and my way alone. Following is not pleasing to me, yet you said in your word that the one who desires greatness should be a servant first.

Lord help me serve my husband in following his lead.

When his way doesn’t ogre well with me, help me trust in you to make him change his mind or ways to conform to your will.

I relegate my control to you. I surrender my will and desires to you. Help my husband make decisions for us that will push us forward.

Help me follow his lead Lord and have a calm spirit that will attract him towards me.

In Jesus name I pray.




We are John and Mary Munene and we love the Lord! Christ is our all in all! All we are is by God’s grace. Apart from having our individual careers, we are ardent bloggers, authors and misters of God's word. We have been blessed with two amazing children. A beautiful daughter and a handsome son. We love adventure, anything with lots of adrenaline is always a ‘go-thing’ for us! A cup of coffee next to a fireplace and a good book always does good to our souls! Hope you enjoy this blog!

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We are John and Mary Munene and we…